5 Ways to Take Care of Yourself
Lately, I’ve been having crazy messy drippy hot flashes. Here’s how it goes: I wake up multiple times in the middle of the night to wet sheets and pillows (yes, I sleep with multiple pillows) and then I can’t go back to sleep. The insomnia lasts for about an hour and the cycle starts all over again. Plus, I have this weird sense of coming out of my skin. Ewwwww. It’s totally reminiscent of when I was sick and yes, has necessitated the dropping of a few f-bombs. Ever since stopping the Tamoxifen, the hot flashes stopped and I have been sleeping. So, this whole situation an utter surprise (& frustration!).
The HOTY insisted that I get in touch with my doctors, which I did. My oncologist said that travel, stress, etc., are factors that sometimes cause this pattern. Hmmm….what about criss-crossing the country is stressful?!? Baffling. The Silver Lining is that he didn’t seem worried about it. However, it is a call to action for myself to stop the cycle and focus on taking care of myself.
Here are some fun ways to do so. Come to think of it, why not do these things on a regular basis, not just when you are a schvitzy, zitty mess?!?
- A date with yourself. I happen to love to go to lunch or dinner by myself. All by myself, where I will know no one. While this may seem anti-social, it’s actually not. It’s an opportunity to spend time getting reacquainted with myself. I’ll often take my favorite book or good magazine, but don’t read while I’m eating. This helps me be fully present for the experience and savor the flavors. I always feel better when I do this and it puts a smile on my face by just writing about it.
- Nap. Napping is one of those experiences that rejuvenates me like no other. I vividly remember my grandfather coming home every day at noon. He would take a 20 minute nap and then have a freshly prepared lunch made by my grandmother. I wholeheartedly believe that this is what helped him live as long and as healthily as he did. So, I’m going to start scheduling a nap in the middle of the day and give it as much of a priority as I would any other meeting or conference call.
- Buy myself some flowers. Looking at and smelling fresh flowers is a complete and total Silver Lining. I am fortunate to have the ability to buy fresh ones at one of the many farmer’s markets that we have every week in Santa Barbara (don’t hate me for that!). There’s also something awfully special about having fresh flowers delivered – to yourself. Talk about a amazing way to treat yourself!
- Watch the sunrise and/or sunset. We have beautiful of both in California (again, please don’t hate me!). My oh my. They are super special and a guaranteed Silver Lining. The thing about watching the sun rise or set is that it is beautiful wherever you are! All you have to do is figure out what time the the sun will either come up or go down where you live by checking on Weather.com. (Punch in your zip code and you’ll see the ETS–or estimated time of sunrise/sunset–towards the bottom of the page, at the bottom of the daily forecast box.) Then choose a great place in your city or town and go watch it. I also like to do this by myself and take deep breaths while the sun goes down. It is incredibly peaceful!
- Don’t Should on Yourself. For regular readers, I know you’ve heard this (multiple times!) before, but it’s so doggone important that it bears repeating (over & over again). Should-ing is NOT good for you and is only a stress-inducer. The more you stop should-ing the easier it gets.
What do you do to take care of yourself? I’d love to hear!
Thank you to Elizabeth Messina, my dear friend an partner in The Silver Lining for this beauteous image!
Great points, Hollye!
Thanks, Val! xx
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Glenda Stephens
You have some great ideas here on how to relax and destress. There are a couple I too do, and a couple I must try. I love twilight and viewing the sunset; and I don't need to envy yours, Hollye, as we have beautiful ones here in Nebraska too. I don't really relish eating out alone, but it may be worth trying. (I always think I would feel weird by myself.) But one can take a cue from those who travel on business, like yourself, and eat out alone.) However, I have picked up food, and then had a picnic in a pleasant spot by myself.
I haven't called them "dates with myself", but occasionally I rather enjoy walks, movies, art galleries, and museums singly. You can go at your own pace and cover what you want.
I too had the "night sweats" when I was on tamoxifen/arimidex. I would get this sheen of perspiration all over my body. I didn't get the insomnia with it; that would be even more annoying.
Perhaps because of your insomnia at night you should try to nap after lunch for half an hour or so to make up for the sleepless nights. Just don't get your nights and days turned around as my husband did. When he complained of not sleeping well at night, his doctor prompted that perhaps he was napping too long in the afternoon. 🙂 That is not a good policy either; again moderation is the answer. I do hope your sleepless nights soon become a thing of the past. Zzzzz…. Sweet dreams.
Thank you so much for wonderful note, Carolee! How inspiring!
P.S. I also enjoy having fresh flowers in the house. I especially enjoy them indoors during winter, and purchase some weekly. They just give me a lift!
Me too! So glad that you do this for yourself!