On September 21,2011 my surgeon called me with the news that the biopsy was positive for breast cancer. This came after having an ultra sound guided biopsy that was negative, but I have a terrific surgeon and a great radiologist that felt this small lump needed to be removed. Dr. M told that “it was small the size of an M&M, a plain one not a peanut”, he always uses food in his analogies making me laugh.
I said how can there be anything left after they took out 5 bits during the biopsy, damn M&Ms aren’t that big, LOL.
I underwent a second surgery on October 27 to remove more tissue and lymph node (sentinel) to determine if it spread to the nodes. The days passed and he called me on Tuesday of the following week to give me the good news, it didn’t spread to the nodes.
WOO HOO! I have gone through all the tests for staging and such, and my silver lining is all this was: It is Stage 1 ductal breast cancer and my OncoDX score was really low; 10 with a cure rate of 91% and I will do best with radiation and hormonal therapy for 5 years.
I was so thankful because I knew it could have been worse, but we caught it early. I started radiation on December 2, 2011 for 32 treatments, 5 days a week. It has taken it’s toll on me as my husband has undergone 4 surgeries since March 2011 and has been disabled with no income coming into the home but with the help of friends and some of my family we have made it through.
I haven’t had much time to reflect on my BC until the other day when i had a meltdown of sorts. After talking with my caregivers and others going through this I am told it’s normal to have emotions like this especially with all that is going on besides my BC. One of the nurses gave me the best advise, say each day “I am a survivor”.
I need to find some time for me. I know my BC journey is nearing it’s end; the radiation anyway. I have only 2 more treatments and then I am done with that p! art. I will miss the comradarie and the nurses and techs, but they are close enough that I can always swing by and say Hi.
I know what you mean. Go ahead and have those meltdowns. You are strong for everybody else, you don't want them to see you are weak and scared, but sometimes it all comes spilling out. It was hard for me to feel like a survivor, because I never really experienced a battle. I changed it up and started to make myself feel like a winner instead. I knew what it felt like to lose. So now say to yourself….I'm a winner!! Because you are. You survived because you had to. You won because you fought back. Stay well. Stay strong!
Thanks so much Karyn Mae. I am deeply appreciative of your note!